and turning for home. Sorry about the quadruple shorties crop. Things here are tough when it comes to finding time for blogging. Actually there's a lot of time, but the hospital just sucks the life out of you and you find yourself just sitting quietly - contemplating.
So, we've picked up some professional help for mom and for my dad, and I am taking advantage of that for what is likely my last chance to get home before the train goes over the top of the hill.
I was talking to Mrs TANBI the other day and I compared our current situation waiting for my mom's health to change to being on a roller coaster at the very top of the first hill. You aren't hearing the click-click-click anymore, so you know the drop is coming but it hasn't started yet, and you really cannot tell when it will. I can remember being on rides where it feels like the train has just stopped. That's sort of what it feels like to be here now. At the bottom of the hill you can see a funeral, a memorial service, the house, my dad and the rest of our lives; but for the moment we're just hanging up at the top of the hill.
And so in that split instant of time I am trying to go back home, recharge, figure out the first few weeks of the semester and what to do if I can't be there, and then maybe look for someplace for my dad for after. All of which feels totally secondary to being here, but I guess needs to be done too.
So tomorrow we do 41-94-90/94-90-80/90-80/76-76-79-579-376. Me, Mrs. TANBI, and my parent's cat who will be joining our household.
So, either you can look at this as an intermission from my more regular posting (which is why the "shorties" are piling up) or as an intermission to the parade of tweets - really its all about your perspective I guess.
Today I had what will in all likelihood be my last Christmas with my mom. The more I think about it though the more I realize that our last Christmas was last Christmas; because even though we did spend the occasion together, it hasn't been much of a holiday.
Mom continues in hospice care at Highland Park Hospital. She's responsive and aware, but those are probably the best things you can say. Moment to moment it is difficult to tell if anyone is home. All things begin equal I think we're talking about days and not weeks, but weeks would not surprise me. Months... who knows?
There continues to be a lot of churning around various logistical issues. As a professional project manager it is extremely frustrating as there are several systemic unknowns which are impossible to nail down. So it's all contingencies. Additionally there are all kinds of rules which I am trying to learn on the fly. For example: Medicare will pay for a residential rehab facility at 100% - but only after a three night hospital stay. So, if you're loved one is home bound and needs 24 hour care, you have to wait until they are injured enough to require a three night hospital stay before you can tap medicare as a resource. Of course by then the problems are inherently much worse than they were when you first thought about rehab, but at least now you have a way to pay for it - for 20 days anyway.
So, I am delving into hospice but at the same time into rehab and home care (on the one end of the spectrum) as well as cemetery and memorial service - and financial issues (on the other). If it weren't personal it might be interesting, no, even if it weren't personal it would be bizarre.
And then on top of the mom issues are the dad issues. Those are in their own special way even more interesting as they have a long term element to them. Perhaps I will find time to talk about them later.
