Friday, October 15, 2004

Missing

Has anyone out there seen my fiance?

I know she's still around somewhere. Its clear her side of the bed has been used. But when I go to work in the morning she isn't there, and when I come home from work she isn't here. When I go to bed there appears to be something under the covers, and there is definitely someone using the shower before me in the morning. Someone is eating the Hot Pockets and taking cans of soda. So I think there is compelling evidence of her presence even though I cannot testify to it myself.

I think this is all the fault of my boss and a former student. My boss is a producer of The Pittsburgh International Festival of Firsts, and a former student under the guise of Cope, Inc. is doing all the tech. Said student hired Marisa to be lighting supervisor. Like two weeks ago she told me that and I haven't seen her since.

Maybe I should set some kind of trap. Maybe something just inside the garage door with a spring loaded gate? Maybe, but Alan says if you're doing it with springs you're doing it wrong. What would be good fiance bait? Perhaps a stack of "The Knot Pittsburgh" magazine? Maybe I shouldn't be thinking fiance bait but just Marisa bait. Something like a life size picture of April. Oh, Oh, I've got it: April holding a copy of "Brides" magazine. That would work. I could rig it like the tiger trap in "The Ghost and the Darkness." She would come in the door from the garage see the picture, walk up to it to investigate and then the door would slam shut behind her. That won't work though. Too many doors from the basement. I need a room with a single egress. Maybe the laundry room. I'll have to think about this some more, maybe do some drawings, make a prototype or something.

If anyone does see Marisa, could you please let her know that she is being missed at home?


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